+++ Previously on what the dickens +++

…Back on track…August closing down like a long-loved department store…nights are drawing in y’know…dark at half eight or some such thereabouts…Manxhester in the area…Mistah Steele over the Irish Sea to the land of Man…cockles of the heart of the seafaring and Norman Wisdom massives no doubt…warmed up…all and sundry happy-go-lucky and carefree as late summer butterflies…oh yeah, have yer bought the elpee yet? Yer actual, bona fide True Believers And The Guises of The Weasel  - get your greasy mitts on a copy, then buy several for kith and kin…this is Phil talking, I wanna tell you what I found to be truuuuu-uh-oh-uh…me and the band been on Neptune for several…going funky via Boogie Down Productions with a feral take on skank-crunk via electronically operated garage so far left of centre has been compared to minimalistic late September ‘87 acid house as performed by Roxette…Eno couldn’t cope and journeyed via the space portal to convalesce on Saturn…must give him a ring…not that he needs one there, mind…R.I.P. Mr Wilson…

swoonsomenorthcheshireplainsoulplainsongelectriccountryfolkblues…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

…Back on track…July already…Wimbledon in full effect…and Pussycat Dolls saving the planet…how times change, eh?..we are the mighty contenders and we come to yer town…when love comes to town…bb king…what’s so funny ‘bout…peace, love and……………………………….............. environmentalism…kyotonogo…mentalist…too much hot air is what we got…rain falls down on centre court…mah singalong prevented… the one what sir cliff invented…carbon trading ‘tis the future…might not suit ya…True Believers And The Guises of The Weasel indeed…buy it…listen…spread da word…pure aural pleasure…at yer leisure…like a benign comet bringing news from afar…where muzak is no more…get to grips with the new style…Andy Steele in full effect…magical…Ile St Louis Blues…can see the video now…marchin’ on across the wilds and beauty…simply marvellous tune and…director location heaven…super Vincent…Lover’s Lament? Have yer heard a better lyric this side of the Millennium?…and as fer Penguin Eggs and…Nobody Whistling…if there’s any justice in this world…according to my mate Lemar…hits abound and everyone is happy…so will you be…warmhearted…sunlit havens…swoonsome Runcorn soulcountryblues…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

…Back on track…Marchin‘ on …Mistah Steele in full effect…and no mistake…get yer ya-ya’s out…goin’ on ahead of America 07...making a name…for himself…oh yeah…rocked the principality and serenaded the crème of Cymru…geetar, keybaord, harmonica, vox…what more could ye ask fer?…ok, songs…you got ‘em: True Believers et Land and Sea plus songs of folk…had to be there to convey…the wondrousness of it all…the man’s a genie out of a bottle…them Birmingham Post people know their stuff…One of These Days/Penguin Eggs/Lover’s Lament/All In A Dream/Sensible Living/Miracle Cure etc etc…oh yes…TRUE BELIEVERS IS GONNA BE MASSIVE…each one of the new a slice of top-notch granary…does yer good……cherish the moment…as Mr Kool and indeed, his Gang were wont to opine…nice one Andy…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

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…Back on track…got me ten gallon hat back…offa the hatcheck girl…best lawyers euros can buy…the might of the biggest band in the world ©…ain’t no mistake…gotta protect yer assets…and no mistake…and the rehashed best of album justintimeferchristmas…dontcha just hate cynicism?…and cash-ins in all their ragged glory?..wouldn’t go near them meself, like…what news from yonder Muddytown?…noo tunes…go tell it on the mountain…hotswingboundlesslullaby…One of These Days…country lovely…back porch wistful lament for poor but honest listeners’ pleasure…romantic and snowblind…a gift-wrapped and lovely present of mountain air-fresh north walian honed tunery…too much hurt going down on this here ball of space rock…think you know the place and curveballs abound…just how good is/are Penguin Eggs?…well, I’ll tell ye…inspired and fired piano and harp…hard shell with a confectioner’s heart…and a slice of laver bread on top…oh yeah…support on the Chinas 25th year in the absurd world of showbiz…see y’all there for those gigs?..check it out…gigs aplenty and in a performance house near you…make sure you mobilise…monsieur muddyhead with these eggs you are spoiling us…cordially invite Mr Radcliffe et al to your Muddyparty…weep and moan all ye weasels…What to tell?…mighty mighty mighty music on the breeze?…aye, it’s Nobody Whistling in My Tree…andy/laura axis of sheer soaring superlative vocalising…jaunty-shanty-jamboree stylee…pure wonderful…these toons get in yer head…instant classics to stand the test of time…mark my words…markmiwurdz…is he still going?…Manassas…Stephen Stills…ace cool…what’s cooler than being  cool?…And So Begins The Task…I’m off to see the wizard…which one are you?…mes amies…amigos…compadres…all you Nacho Libres…work ‘til you’re musclebound…Bass Man as Cowardly Lion…The Drummer Boy as Tin Man…that one got lazyitis…that one go it alone…Edge boy = Scarecrow…and me?…is Dorothy and The Great Oz…dreamer and magician…a magical dreamer and purveyor of smokescreen illusions masquerading as mixed up madness and mash-up mayhem might be mistaken for Mexican mariachi music…TRUEBELIEVERSANDTHEGUISESOFTHEWEASEL…I’m a believer…ain’t you?…then go tell all…and indeed, sundry…that one goes woah, woah, woah, wo-wo woah, woah, woah…roll up, roll up…all the way home…the circus is in town…Karl Denver…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

…Back on track…hey you the rock steady crew…beat boys…ready…electric boogaloo…true believers out there…listen to the mighty, mighty new sounds…an august time to be plying us with new intoxicating sounds…have ye taken a peek at the listen-in page?…methinks that the Muddsters have struck gold…one of these days…country lovely…back porch wistful lament for poor but honest listeners’ pleasure…romantic and snowblind…a gift-wrapped and lovely present of mountain air-fresh north walian honed tunery…too much hurt going down on this here ball of space rock…think you know the place and curveballs abound…just how good is/are penguin eggs?…well, I’ll tell ye…inspired and fired piano and harp…hard shell with a confectioner’s heart…and a slice of laver bread on top…monsieur muddyhead with these eggs you are spoiling us…weep and moan all ye weasels…Edge boy (for it is he) manufacturing wah-wah keyring-gizmoid…wants to tour with said object…a-la Kraftwerk…on lecterns…told him, I said, it’s already been done…’Not with a wah-wah keyring-gizmoid’ says the poor deluded fool…what to do?…had enough of them anyways…need time to chew that one over…off to retreat…get me head together…mutant hybrid creature…mighty mighty mighty music on the breeze?…aye, it’s nobody whistling in ma tree…andy/laura axis of sheer soaring superlative vocalising…duaneeddyishgeeetar (Edgeboy, take note)…jaunty-shanty-jamboree stylee…pure wonderful…these toons get in yer head…instant classics to stand the test of time…mark my words…markmiwurdz…is he still going?…I’m off to see the wizard…which one are you?…Night And Day a la Septembre, mes amies…amigos…compadres…all you Nacho Libres…work ‘til you’re musclebound…Bass Man as Cowardly Lion…The Drummer Boy as Tin Man…that one got lazyitis…that one go it alone…Edgeboy gotta be Scarecrow…and me?…me is Dorothy and The Great Oz…dreamer and magician…a magical dreamer and purveyor of smokescreen illusions masquerading as mixed up music…that one goes woah, woah, woah, wo-wo woah, woah, woah…roll up, roll up…all the way home…the circus is in town…Karl Denver…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

…Back on track…Sunday in July beckoned…and Beckham relented…end of a dream…golden generation sign off…and so does dear Syd…the stratosphere has reclaimed its pschye-pop-traveller genius…Arnold’s biographer has flown the nest…returning as a golden eagle…swoop-down vision and a whole lotta too…Julie Ocean…crazy desire…while everybody else was sleeping…Undertones psychedelia never fully appreciated…in the pale moonshine…teenagers grow up doncha know?… Slovakian cabbage soup and strudel too much for The Drummer…doing DIY on a Galway cave…The Bass Player lives in a stable…The Geetar Player holed out in Echo Canyon, next to Wah-Wah Gulch…where reverb bounces and tremolo arms wink like Ronaldo…me?…thanks for askin’…summertime and the livin’ ain’t easy, let me tell ye…where’s Mr Eno when ye need him?…not in thrall to my xylo-drum contraption of beauty…modulated hi-hat/chimevibe synthesis…sounded great at 3.12am…in my head…zom-bieh, zom-bieh…Muddy boys and girl at the Summer Pops…with me old compadre Mr Kerr, no doubt and twice on Thursdays…when she called her name and I called mine…Spiral in da house…then Runcorn/Manchester axis of Bo weevil…this mighty Muddy river becoming a landmark feature…ox-bow lake oasis of sound…breaking out over you and me like waterfall-fresh downpour…take me dancing naked in the rain…ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh-oh…din-der-dinder-der-der; din-der-dinder-der-der…Blue Pearl…dried off with a layer of sweet and sour honeyed air …bathed in the sunlit glow of life-affirmation…realise you’re in the presence of and breathe it in and share…like the pine I am lonesome for you…and what a title, eh?…twist of genius in that, if yer asking me let me tell ye…and I knows me titles, alright?…dig out the weasels…Messrs Steele and Daly as modern-day Ratty and Toad…poop, poop…wheedle out the charlatan fakers…half a pound of tupenny rice…snake-oil dealers and sheep as people…time for true believers to inherit what’s worth it…here’s to you and up to you…oh come Muddy faithful…send out posi-vibe signals to all and sundry…not just on Sundays…mix it up and make it nice…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

last month of June.....

…Back on track…Moon in June…egg and spoon…golf at Troon…macaroon…Happy Birthday to my mate Macca…and to Mr B Wilson…now there’s a coupla bass men…here’s the news…my band to split…had just about enough, so called their bluff…Crewcut Drummer off to form techno-dub-folktronica ensemble…in Slovakia…Male Model bassman doing something or other…but mainly the other…Chapeau Dave wants to make beanie hats outta balsa wood for pigs…with electric sensors to create that ‘farmyard surround sound’…whatever that is…Edgehogs will be all the rage…apparently…but not in my house…surely now ye see why I is leaving?…I and I to take anIcelandicana nu-folk direction tip thing…solo but trio…playing drums a la Stevie Wonder…xylophone in the Patrick Moore style…no Stevie Staunton, no World Cup…gigs aplenty in MuddyLand(andSEA)…s’porting the Minds and Summer Pops and no mistake…repeat of Roxy with knobs on…new elpee on the go…mountain air and dingle dangle scarecrows…word is out on the hills of Northern Cymru…many rivers to cross…Jimmy Cliff…better than Jimmy Headland…Jimmy Promontory…Jimmy Archipelago…mind you, Mr Archipelago had a mean left foot…where am I?…who are you?…more to the point…why?…early morning and everything has turned outreasonably fine…Brindley…Night and Day…shows to go to…spread the Muddyword amongst yer kith and kin…cajole, carouse and convince…famous lawyers all…philosophy on hold…too hot and no relief except for sleeping…only takes a minute girl…or do you prefer the heart-wrench of romantic agony…to fall in love…talking of which…Blameless Life…Land and Sea…Good Friends…Messrs Steele et Daly…exquisite manners, all round good gents andpurveyors of perfect slices of marble cake music…washed down with anelixir of vocalised warmth, reflection, heart and soul…summer rain… LivingRoomshowprimecoolnesstunesandsonsmitheryasevermeseenandheardandmscampbellsimplymarvellousalso…Hamburg…aperitif fur die fusballspielen…spring watch…Gnarls Barkley vs. Bill Oddie… swallows and amazons…summer breeze makes me feel fine…Garth Hudson swirls his organ…Neil blows his prairie harp…provoking echoes of timeless abandon…blowing through the canyons of my miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiind…man…gotta go…feeling the vibe for my vibes…xylo-solo coming on strong…take some time to find a new thing,hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

…Back on track…May the force be with ye and yours…start with the sad news…dear old Grant McLennan…Go-Between shining from afar…how come the good ‘uns go early, eh?…listen to 16 Lovers Lane…late ‘80’s masterpiece…also Horsebreaker Star…you like banjos?…there on Race Day Rag… and all things modernly countrified…gently twisting…like wrought ironwork…strong and tender…sigh…onward and onward…what’s the point of peaking when you’ve so much further to go?…svengalis abound and all I’m wanting…is a ticket to a Living Room of my choice this Maytime…Mayfly lives only a day… think on…Curtis Mayfield…wow…did ye see my next venture?…editing The Independent on 16 May…Muddy review from Liverpool… Manchester…Nottingham?…take yer pick…no sleep til Birmingham…or, indeed, Londinium…interview with MY band…BreadHead…DunderHead…ShowerHead…Hedgeman the geetariststrokegardenexpert…and manager CloudyHeadHalfPintGuinness…keep it under yer hat…Hedgeman asked me if I be editing digitally or on tape machine…lives in a studio bubble…bobble hatted plectrum wielding freakoid…but what can I do?…what can I do?…election special… iPod cabinet reshuffle…too much information…infojam…simple honesty wins the day…technoid worship elevates the hard side and enervates the soul…and we all need soul, don’t we Curtis?…replace rudeness and reclaim respect…for yer heart…for yer soul…embellish yer aura…go tell it on the mountain…Land and Sea is pure sublime so it is…gosh…the hook…the line…the sinker…The Theatre List…Sensible Living…No Relief…grab a hold and won’t let go…spread the word…like jam and butter as invitations to a freshly baked scone…bake it and take it to yer friends…they’ll love ye even more…musical carbohydrates…and protein too…respect yerself…na, na ,na ,na-na-na…Pops and Mavis…Singers of a Staple variety…Canadian Joni and Acadian Driftwood…preach to the non-converted and share the dream…honest pilgrims in pursuit…call me tomorrow that’s fine…may the good ship Muddy-o sail safely into harbour’s rest in the landlocked heartlands and the seafarers ports of this mixed-up land…gently coaxed into welcoming waters…by you…me…them…us…trust me, I‘m an editor…they won’t let ye down…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

…Back on track…Big Pink…April showers…drip…drip…drop…launch has been and gone…and everlasting ripples abound…Land and Sea is a beautiful thing…maximum gravy and no mistake…The Korova…crocodiles and all that jazz…Rick Danko…he’s yer man… keening vocals…subtle blends of rock-you-to-sleep melodic gems…stirring the soul…the feet…tidy rhythms and inspired arranging…the brain…singing, moving, feeling, grooving…the heart…listen to your heart…ok, that was Roxette but you know what I mean…leather jackets and scary hair…but enough of our drummer…Michael Hurley tribute album…Edge asking if he be related to Steve’ Silk’ Hurley…Sad Hat Man likes to jack his body…or so I’m told…thinks Liz Hurley’s his sister…not Michael, Steve…just go to Chicago and get it out of yer system…Garth Hudson’s organ swirls…album heading for folk country idiom mixed with new jack swing…Pharrell’s been on the ’phone…kept him on hold…I know my place…and now so does he…monthly muzak mags revisiting sourfaced no marks…do I sound bitter…I feel better now…where be the Muddy reviews?…oh well…class will out…Living Room gigs…standard lamps and armchairs …coming to a place near you…yes, YOU…see you there, mon frere…et ma soeur…Call Me…mighty fine grower of a song…sounds of a slow burn single to these cloth ears…but hey…what do I know…Richard Manuel…plenty more where that have been and come from…pen is mightier than the sword…Meg Ryan vs. Parkinson…know who’s side I’m on…and it ain’t Michael’s…Mark E Smith vs. Parky…nice touch…boxing match…Pharrell been holding so long he’s remixed Greensleeves…jousting…world’s gone medieval…Muddy & Gorky’s Historic Space  Ensemble play the OST…live on Venus with Brian Wilson…back to the future…supporting th’Head…now that’s a show…let me go…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

Back on track…Marchin’ on…Chico Time…cheek o’ time…and tide waits for no man y‘know…and you’re no island either…sooner or later winds of change will find you…and I don’t mean The Scorpions…whistling down the Wall…I got the vex factor…beware the ides of March…much binding in the Marsh…and the elpee is out there…winding its way around little fingers…charming its way into hearts, minds, ears and HMV bags…pumping on your stereo…Land and Sea essential purchase…the warm glow of contentment as you walk out of Borders…think Ready Brek…heart cockles refreshed on hearing its beauty…bounce into Spring…favourite season…or is it pepper…and then it lands in your home…like a welcome, long lost friend…kelly watch the stars…Edge a hat man for all four seasons…Viv and his Aldi super markets…never takes it off…just a bal’head on effects pedals…Billy Butler…Mersey Pirate…folk concept album on schedule… three months set aside for string changes on Dave’s Flying V…Flatley bottled the gig…gone for Kanye…did ye see?…teaching him how to be a nicer person…believe that, believe anything…take your rival to Australia…nature abhors a vacuum and the charts are no different…cruel to be even crueller…but kindness should know no bounds…anyways…did ye hear session de la Ms Long?…aces, man, just aces…airwaves a-shimmering…Miracle Cure…Good Friends…No Relief…sounded simply marvellous…and how…Mistah Daly’s Anglo-Saxon…Listen Again…Pebble Mill…tell yer friends…yer enemies…yer neighbours…yer lovers…this Muddy sound does yer good…Sensible Living…wraps and yearns its tendrils round your  heart with pedal steel abandon…launch 20TH MARCH…in someone else’s Living Room…launch pad…rockit…Herbie Hancock…Flying Burritos…myspace is outerspace…where are you?…I’m a guilty man and I walk these hills…on Jupiter…22 Grammys…I know what I talk about…Sophie Solomon…Jim Moray…word is most definitely out…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

…Back on track…Febru-ary/And trees are like bears/without their chairs/what do I cares…chill in the air, misty morn and rocky mountain jamboree…cold hands, warm heart…bit of romance does ye good in intemperate climes…the riverbank is a-chiming …ole man Radcliffe he just keep playing that song…Miracle Cure…Edge needs one…keep telling him…all that disco geetar tomfoolery, man…Muddy‘s where it‘s at…Poptart? Folktart more likes…next triple concept ‘Riverbankz’ with Michael Flatley on lead Bez…Oh, I’m on the Edge alreet but he disnae know it…tours of ancient monuments…nowhere to plug in…and whaddya know…long-time supporter of the boho dance Janice…great to hear yer…late nite session at tail end of this month…in France they kiss on Main St…but I’m exiled from there…don’t forget yer sweetheart…fear is the enemy of love…is it me or does the radddio (as me dear friend Van the White Van Man is inclined to holler) do the justice to the Muddy sound?…Last Waltz…ultra-cool…Catskill Mountain Woodstock vibe…wood smoke…Levon plays the drums…the poet laureates of techno 2 Unlimited…y’all ready for this?…duh-duh-duh der-der-der-der duh-duh der der der derr…perish the thought but hold it close…where be the Dutch lyrical gangsters?…no valley too deep and no mountain too high…and that terrible band that you liked……building sweetly and rising like an Eno climax…leopard, panther…whatever, same difference …Call Me and Sensible Living on multi-rotate at Bono Towers…payola boys don’t mean nothing to me…seeps into yer brain, makes yer think and ruffles the feathers of yer heart…LANDANDSEATWENTYSEVENTHOFFEBRUARY…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…Peace Out…Bono

Back on track…Hey Mr Jarndyce/put a record on/I wanna dance with my baby…top hat sir and no mistake, mistah…Mr Steele-Daly-Chesters-Lambert-Williams and erstwhile Ms Campbell, with these hugely swoonsome tunes you are spoiling us…airwaves a-tingling for the Muddster sound…ear-friendly ‘88-91...FM…BBC Radio 2’ play the sweet and lowdown-neat  sounds of  riverbank folk-pop…Edge adamant that Smallweed do grow in unkempt bonsai gardens…just a character, Dave, just a character…Rock on, hatman…Scatman John…be-bop-da-bada-bop…aviator shades, private planes  and a rocksteady beat…imagination  surely is a wondrous thing…ol’ Charlie-Boy writes a classic…suddenly a world and his/her wife want pieces of  C19th action…Mr Joyce never had the problem…bandwagons are for jumping on boooyyyyyyyeeee…the mighty ’Head wagon is picking up speed like a technicolour pantechnicon on the downward slide of a 1:2 incline…momentum is everything…good ole Mark and Janice is what I say…push the light and watch the glimmer, over yours and theirs and mine, support the glow and love the shimmer, praise its youth and let it shine …landandsea and gigs a-go-go to follow…hey, hey…I and I do spread the notion in jubilation and celebration…the Liffey never looked so lovely in all its arctic glory…wend, meander and flow…three words I’m liking…spirit of th’Head methinks …glorious elpee y’know…word is (getting) out…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing…I’m the Scatman…Peace Out…Bono

DEC 05

Back on track…flying home for winter like a bird in reverse migration…revegration…Edge talking ‘bout wah-wah this and wooh-wooh that…techno-freakery, just give me the songs…anyways he gets the cover of The Word, I get Q, know what I mean?…back to warmth… don’t hear that, hear this; this is the heavy, heavy Muddster sound…fell in love more times than several over last few months with a new slice of  North Cheshire floodplain & Mersey riverbank sound …david blaine, freda payne, john coltrane and paul mcshane…ah, Muddyhead sure’nuff ’n’ yes I know do so make mighty fine tunes …born under a good sign …’Land and Sea’, a first elpee…aching melody, yarns aplenty hit the spot of hard-done by and hard-won…poignancy never fails to amaze… obvious fun had by all,  meeting of minds by the river, knowing all the time that this is heading somewhere good…call me anytime…takes a hairdo to smile…jumps the brain and rides a wayward journey to your heart…take the plunge…got our recruits & our green mohair suits…Messrs Steele/Daly/Chesters/Lambert/Campbell/Williams…Trojans all in the name of swoonsome folk-pop-rock…wooden horse-less but sparkling surprises…guitar, drums, bass, keyboards, piano, melodica, tin whistle, pedal steel…dazzle…vocals yearning, keening, exploring…folk-clubs and Roxy Music will testify…Edge just realised ‘One’ is Eno in reverse…so for songs at this year’s turning… listen to this Muddyhead… it’s good for you…take some time to find a new thing, hold it close and let it swing.…Peace out…Bono